How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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