I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize