god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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