i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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