I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I love having hate sex.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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