A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
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My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Man, jail baloney is awful.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
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While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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