Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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