Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
People in love make me want to vomit
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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