sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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