I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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