I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize