You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize