you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
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so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
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I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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