I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize