Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just googled if crying burns calories
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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