is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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