I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize