hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
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merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
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Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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