she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize