i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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