last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
The power of my boobs compel you
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize