I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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