dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
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I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
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Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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