This dress was meant to end up on your floor
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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