Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize