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pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
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