Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize