So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
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