The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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