I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize