I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize