I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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