their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize