Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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