Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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