Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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