I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at about main and main street
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize