Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
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I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
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Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize