I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
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