So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize