so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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