There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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