I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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