her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize