went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I'm really busy with my period
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