meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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