OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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