I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
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My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
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I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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