Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize