you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize